Thanks to Kevin for this:
Today’s programme features another chance to take part in our exciting
competition:
Hop on a boat and win a Housing Commission HOUSE!
We’ve already given away hundreds of millions of dollars and thousands of dream
homes, courtesy of our sponsor, The Australian Taxpayer.
And don’t forget, we’re now the fastest growing game on the planet.
Anyone can play, provided they don’t already hold a valid Australian Passport
and, you only need one word of English: ‘ASYLUM’
Prizes include all-expenses-paid accommodation, cash benefits starting at $800 a
week and a chance to earn thousands more begging, mugging and accosting drivers
at traffic lights.
This competition is open to everyone – buy a ticket to Indonesia and catch the
first available boat.
No application ever refused – reasonable or unreasonable.
All you need to do is destroy your papers or burn your boat.
Once you Enter Australian waters remember the magic password: ‘ASYLUM’
A few years ago, 140 members of a Taliban family from Afghanistan were flown
Goat Class from Kabul to Indonesia’s gateway where agents were on hand to
fast-track them to their boat trips to luxury accommodation . They joined tens
of thousands of other lucky winners already staying in hotels all over Australia
.
Our popular destinations include Baxter’s Reef and the world famous Christmas
Island resort. If you’re still unsure, there’s no need to phone a friend or ask
an audience –
Apply for legal aid. Hundreds of lawyers, social workers and counsellors here
are waiting to help you. It won’t cost you a cent. It could change your life
forever. So play today.
Iraqi terrorists, Afghan dissidents, Albanian gangsters, pro-Pinochet activists,
anti-Pinochet activists, Kosovan drug-smugglers, Tamil Tigers, bogus Bosnians,
Rwandan mass murderers, Somali guerrillas… all welcome
COME ON DOWN!
Get along to Indonesia Get along to the fishing ports Don’t stop in Thailand or
Bali Go straight to Australia
And you are:
GUARANTEED to be one of tens of thousands of lucky winners in the easiest game
on earth.
Everyone’s a winner, when they play ‘ASYLUM’
