Open House

Posted on March 9, 2012 by KG

“I heard there was an Indian brave who had 3 squaws. He took the first to bed on a buffalo hide and she bore him a son, the second on a lion skin and likewise she gave him a son. The 3rd he bedded on a hippo hide and behold she had twin boys. This just goes to show that the squaw on the hippopotamus is equal to the the sum of the squaws on the other two hides.”      Mawm.

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73 Responses to Open House

  1. KG says:
    March 9, 2012 at 22:19

    Drinking cold beer on a warm, moonlit night and watching the fruit bats squabbling in the palm tree.
    Almost as good as being out at sea fishing. :smile:

    • Darin says:
      March 10, 2012 at 00:50

      Shouldn’t you be knocking together some sort of boat?Lash together some old packing crates and stuff some styro in it.Don’t even need registration,if the Coasties complain and your on land just claim it’s your “tribal cultural right” then call them raaaaaacists.
      If your out at sea when they tap you, just say your “seeking asylum”and call them raaaaaaacists.Might help if you get a really dark tan first though :mrgreen:

      • Mawm says:
        March 10, 2012 at 05:36

        It’s not much fun on the high seas at the moment. Days of big winds from the SE, rain again today and then big winds from the NE. Heh, I didn’t know my boat could do 7.5 kts for sustained periods! :shock:

        • KG says:
          March 10, 2012 at 06:19

          That’s an impressive clip, Mawm, but it sounds like hard work too.
          A quiet anchorage, a book and a bottle of scotch would be my solution… :smile:
          Kingfish Lodge, Whangaroa is perfect in those conditions.

          • Mawm says:
            March 10, 2012 at 06:29

            In Fitzroy on GBI with a good book and a smart phone. There is also some cricket to listen to. This has been an effing awful summer in these soggy islands.

  2. KG says:
    March 9, 2012 at 22:54

    Pravda: ‘Arizona sheriff finds Obama presidential qualifications forged’
    http://english.pravda.ru/opinion/columnists/07-03-2012/120708-arizona_sheriff_obama-0/

    • The Gantt Guy says:
      March 10, 2012 at 07:19

      Watch for Sheriff Joe to meet with a nasty accident.

      That’s a good article that sums up the fraud better than I’ve seen elsewhere. The question I have is, what happens if he is proven to be a usurper? What happens to all those Exec Orders and laws he signed? What if the fall out from such a Constitutional Crisis?

      • KG says:
        March 10, 2012 at 07:32

        What have we come to, when Pravda runs the stories about a Democrat President that the American media won’t touch?

  3. Katie says:
    March 10, 2012 at 03:23

    Winter is over.
    The temps have been high daily.
    The birds are leaving.

    Bad Haiku for a Friday.

  4. Ciaron says:
    March 10, 2012 at 06:16

    Doesn’t anyone know what a 3,4,5 triangle is or the pythagoras theorem anymore? :???:

    • Mawm says:
      March 10, 2012 at 06:38

      I heard there was an Indian brave who had 3 squaws. He took the first to bed on a buffalo hide and she bore him a son, the second on a lion skin and likewise she gave him a son. The 3rd he bedded on a hippo hide and behold she had twin boys. This just goes to show that the squaw on the hippopotamus is equal to the the sum of the squaws on the other two hides.

    • KG says:
      March 10, 2012 at 06:39

      Pretty much only the oldies like you, Ciaron. :roll:

      • Ciaron says:
        March 10, 2012 at 06:42

        I turned 33 last week :shock:

        • Mawm says:
          March 10, 2012 at 06:50

          He’s just a child KG :shock:

        • jonno1 says:
          March 10, 2012 at 08:03

          When my son was at high school he didn’t like maths very much, but was having to learn some trig. “What use is it?” he asked.

          At the time I was about to add a 6x6m garage to the front of my house, so asked him how I could be sure it was square. I then marked off 3m from the corner and attached 2 string lines marked at 4m & 5m to the corner and the other end respectively. Finally, asked him to take the two marked lines and straighten them out while holding them together at the marks. Voila! a right angle.

          He’s now nearly your age Ciaron, owns a building company employing a dozen staff, and does this stuff every day. Comes down to practical application I guess.

          Actually, I had a similar problem at high school with calculus – couldn’t get my head around differential equations. Then one day I suddenly realised that dy/dx was simply the slope! Light bulbs burst into life all round.

    • The Gantt Guy says:
      March 10, 2012 at 20:35

      You know you don’t need that shit now Al Gore invented the Internet, right?

  5. KG says:
    March 10, 2012 at 06:55

    He is! Should one so young be trusted with slide rule, abacus and log tables?

    • Ciaron says:
      March 10, 2012 at 09:47

      perhaps it would be better than a spread sheet… I prefer to do calcs with a good ole carbon stick :smile:

      • Darin says:
        March 10, 2012 at 11:07

        My boss cut his teeth in the Brooklyn Naval yards designing Aircraft Carriers and Destroyers when all they had were Slipsticks most of which didn’t have a square root function and the pocket calculator was still 25 years away :shock:

        Which BTW,if any of you folks happen across a Fuller Calculator forsale at a good price please let me know.

    • WAKE UP says:
      March 10, 2012 at 12:46

      “slide rule, abacus and log tables”

      Good grief, do they still exist ? ;-)

      • KG says:
        March 10, 2012 at 12:54

        Heh! Well, they certainly exist. And some pilots still use a variation on the old guess-stick.
        Arthur C. Clarke wrote a wonderful SF short story once, about the crew of a spaceship being saved by an abacus. Maybe Oswald Bastable will know the title?
        Got it! ‘Into the Comet’ (1960) by Arthur C. Clarke.

  6. octagongrappler says:
    March 10, 2012 at 07:00

    http://www.nzherald.co.nz/lincoln-tan/news/article.cfm?a_id=308&objectid=10790786

    New immigration laws are racist!!! Under the new laws Pacific migrants will have to meet annual earnings of $31k a year if they have dependant children and singles must meet earnings set at the unemployment benefit????????????????????????

    • Jay says:
      March 10, 2012 at 18:30

      Shit. National doing something useful for once. NZ doesn’t need another South Auckland.

  7. KG says:
    March 10, 2012 at 07:18

    We need a smiley symbol for “shaking head in disbelief”, Grapples.

  8. Darin says:
    March 10, 2012 at 11:38

    Another Indian joke(Feather not Dot).

    An old Indian Chief and his squaw were riding on the new Iron Horse.Being the first time on a train they were both amazed at the wonders they saw.

    After awhile the Chief became thirsty so he asked his squaw to fetch him some water to drink.A few minutes later she returned with a tin cup full of nice cool water.A little while later he became thirsty again and asked her to fetch him some more water.This time she returned with an empty cup.The Chief asked her “where is the water I sent you for?”

    She said “I couldn’t get any this time” “Why not?” the Chief asked,she answered-“Because Pale face sit on well”

  10. KG says:
    March 10, 2012 at 17:45

    :roll: About gears, an electric motor and an inert block of concrete, is what.

    • Darin says:
      March 10, 2012 at 18:19

      It demonstrates the implications of an exponential function in an equation.The motor is making 200 RPM and if we transmit that through a reduction of 50:1 twelve times we get one revolution in 2trillion years.The final output shaft is moving,but so slowly it can be cast in concrete.In Fact the fourth gear reduction will take an entire human lifetime to make one revolution.
      Of course it will never make one revolution for two reasons-
      #1 It’s gonna wear out a LOT of freakin motors and more than a few gears before it does.
      #2 At 2trillion years out Entropy will have long since snuffed the brightest stars and all molecular motion in the Universe will have ceased as a result.

      But that’s all in the future,right now the two exponintial equations most pressing are the intrest on the national debt and the number of times Obama s—ts on the Constitution.

  11. KG says:
    March 10, 2012 at 18:04

    Saturday night…it’s all go here. Debating whether to have another coffee or to cook dinner. (a toasted cheese sandwich).
    The hell with it, another coffee and a movie will do.

  12. KG says:
    March 10, 2012 at 18:27

    “#2 At 2trillion years out Entropy will have long since snuffed the brightest stars and all molecular motion in the Universe will have ceased as a result.”
    I’m willing to bet that somewhere, somehow, some bastard with a clipboard and name badge will still be there.

    • Darin says:
      March 10, 2012 at 18:30

      Bureaucrats are the only known objects that move slower than that block of concrete.

  14. KG says:
    March 10, 2012 at 19:25

    Heh! “the mills of God…….”
    ‘Official: Toll in Israel Gaza strikes 12 militants
    The flare-up began midmorning Friday, when an Israeli airstrike targeted the commander of one of the militant groups behind the abduction of an Israeli soldier five years ago.‘
    http://www.foxnews.com/world/2012/03/09/israeli-airstrike-kills-militant-commander/#ixzz1ohja02fF

  17. Andrei says:
    March 10, 2012 at 19:59

    OK I did a quick and dirty but it works it is the same size as the others and the surely eyes roll :arrow:

    I fixed the favicon too but that might not show up for you immediately because of caching – it looks good

  18. KG says:
    March 10, 2012 at 20:05

    Brilliant! Thanks so much Andrei, I appreciate the trouble you took. :smile: It looks great.

  19. Anonymous says:
    March 10, 2012 at 20:42

    :roll So I’m a perfectionist and have now done it properly. This way we can find some more cool ones

  20. Andrei says:
    March 10, 2012 at 20:43

    I have also become anonymous sigh

  22. KG says:
    March 11, 2012 at 00:08

    A hint for Andrei, is it Darin? :mrgreen:

  23. KG says:
    March 11, 2012 at 00:13

    :shock: sounds like somebody I might know…

  24. KG says:
    March 11, 2012 at 00:28

    Since you’re having so much fun, when are you going to do another post? Eh?
    The last one was very well received by your friends here. (I won’t tell you about all the hate mail I got as a result :roll: )
    Anything but a discourse on concrete blocks and reduction gearing….

    • Darin says:
      March 11, 2012 at 00:44

      Hate mail….I love hate mail :twisted: should I start posting my e-mail addy? :twisted: :twisted:

      Seems I do owe you a post on imported labor from awhile back,maybe tomorrow or next week…

  25. KG says:
    March 11, 2012 at 00:31

    Off to bed. I’ve had too much beer forced on me.

  26. Andrei says:
    March 11, 2012 at 04:53

    :popcorn there is no need to :rant and there is no need for :censor or even :wtf cause it all is in place

  27. KG says:
    March 11, 2012 at 05:28

    YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY! Great stuff! Thanks, Andrei. :grin: :grin: